Parenting common sense - why not a child's most respected person is not a parent? (depth:)!
zhongguoyouerjiaoyuwang· 2017-11-28 11:36:30
a survey of American and Japanese children respected is ranked first in the father, and Chinese children in mind, most people do not respect their parents, parents are in the back row. The child does not lie, and in his mind is that.
, in fact, many of the only children are trained by their parents to become male and female mothers. Therefore, the age is increasing, or mom and baby are the ones. They always feel that their parents' care is proper. Not children do not understand the affection, but they are training to become the mother treasure, psychologically not weaning.
, the most respected child of Chinese children is not their parents.
, more than ten years ago, a research institution conducted a questionnaire survey of children who came from the US, Japan and China.
children in the United States the most respected people is ranked first in the second is the father, Jordan, is the mother of third children;
Japan's most respected people is also ranked first in the second is the father, mother, third Sakamoto Ryoma (Meiji hero);
under investigation in the group of the Chinese child's mind, most respected people are not parents, his father was in the tenth row, the mother is more miserable, out of the top 10, ranked eleventh. The child does not lie, and in his mind is that." when the Spanish EFE made such a telegraph: "China many parents think they are the best family educator in the world, falling but they cannot stop their status in the eyes of a child. "
some people say that this is the sad phenomenon of the only child with Chinese characteristics.
Fei Zhengqing research center of Harvard University has studied a subject: "how to deal with the future of China?" "The American scholar said," 30 years later, human history will usher in a country consisting of only children. This country is not a small country but a big country. How will they get along with the world? Is this the gospel or the disaster? "
what kind of parents are rare to be respected by their children?"
, of course, the results of this survey are limited to those children who have been investigated. Not all the Chinese children most respected in their hearts are not parents. I thought about this, and this result can not be blamed for all the children, and the way of parents' education is also very critical. There are probably a few kinds of parents in
, and although they can do everything for their children, it's hard to get the respect of their children.
1, often complain that children do not listen to parents, is not respected; anything children are the parents, is the lack of respect (for example to children to learn the piano, to steal the child's diary to understand children's thoughts to children for the first class, the best is the city's first).
2, must put their ideals into the child ideal, but not to respect, let the child is the main drawback of parents China glorify and illuminate the ancestors.
3, the parents of real big money are not necessarily respected by children. Even respect is not respect for parents, but respect for wealth. Children withdraw from society to family, and everything is for rich or powerful father to solve.
children's filial piety and parents are justified by virtue, but they are the virtues of ancient civilizations. However, after respecting, we can talk about filial piety and place their parents in tenth or eleventh places. Now, China so-called "filial", is the meaning of filial piety: parents filial son, son.
I love my child so much, does she love me? Long Jiangang, a famous professor of sociology at
, once published an analysis on the issue of the only child in China, which was widely spread in his parents' circle of friends. In his article, a woman in the United States to write an e-mail to him, the general content is as follows:
I was a single mother of 38 years old is alone with her 8 year old daughter's life, not to say a lot of women also bear bitter hardships, has not experienced the sour. In order to make her daughter unaffected by her father's departure, I care for her growth with all my mother's love.
's daughter, from nine in Foshan to the first of Foshan, is a very excellent student and is a standard master of learning. The college entrance examination took the top 5 in Foshan, and was admitted to Tsinghua University's nuclear physics specialty. After graduation, it was admitted to University of Chicago.
my son-in-law is also a Shanghai study bully, not very old, and is already a professor of University of Chicago. They had a four year old son, and the grandparents of Shanghai took care of the two years in the United States and returned to Shanghai in June this year. One of the main reasons for
is that my daughter and them are not good, often quarreling. Served as Shanghai cadres grandpa grandma go back with angry, said to the United States no longer suffer.
helplessness, the daughter, son-in-law many times to ask me for help, let me go to Chicago to help them take their children. After I retired rehired units, have a good income, good mood. In the light of my daughter's situation, I finally decided to go to the United States.
but every day here is very sad, life is not familiar with the second, mainly the daughter, son-in-law almost seldom communicate with me. They just want to go home to sleep, morning to evening, weekend also sleep at home, I am the only one busy. It seems that everything I do is supposed to be.
in the holidays, they took their children out for a holiday and left me at home alone. I really don't know what they think. It was the United States that changed him
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